The Speaker's Eye 1882 George Grossmith

Dr. Pitt-Payne in London UK - 02 Jul 2002

Mr. Peter Jones was a wealthy soul,
he represented
SloppertonCumSlushyintheHole
he had been in the House for thirty years,
and joined in the groans and led the cheers;
but though he stuck to his seat like a leech,
he never had made his maiden speech,
all through the day and night he'd try,
but never could he catch the Speaker's eye!
He never could catch,
[Sound Fx] Whistle
He never could catch
[Sound Fx] Whistle
he never, no confound it never,
could catch the Speaker's eye!

When he thought his chance
at last had come,
he'd clear his throat with a loud "Ha! Hum!"
and running his fingers through his hair,
he'd rise and face the Speaker's Chair;
but the Speaker always turned his head,
and looked at someone else instead,
then Jones would sit down with a sigh,
for he never could catch the Speaker's eye!
He never could catch,
[Sound Fx] Whistle
He never could catch
[Sound Fx] Whistle
he never, no confound it never,
could catch the Speaker's eye!

At times it drove him nearly wild,
he'd almost swear, he felt so riled,
his speech was always in arrears,
the accumulation of thirty years;
when he thought of its length
he was sick at heart,
for fear he'd forgotten the opening part,
then he'd stamp, and whistle, and call out Hi!
but he never could catch the Speaker's eye!
He never could catch,
[Sound Fx] Whistle
He never could catch
[Sound Fx] Whistle
he never, no confound it never,
could catch the Speaker's eye!

One night at the close of a long debate,
he rose, and Ah! ecstatic fate,
there smiling blandly o'er the Mace,
The Speaker looked him in the face;
and then and there in solemn tones,
he clapped the Censure on poor Jones,
Jones left the House with a long goodbye,
for he'd caught too much
in that Speaker's eye!
He'd caught too much
[Sound Fx] Whistle
He'd caught too much
[Sound Fx] Whistle
He'd caught too much, confound it yes,
too much in that Speaker's eye!

Poor Jones went to bed, but got no rest,
for he dreamt that the Speaker
was sitting on his chest,
The Censure, backed by a Party Vote
was ramming his speech
right down his throat;
The Premier was chopping off his head
with an axe,
to silence his objections to The Income Tax,
then Jones hit out with a fiendish cry,
and caught the Speaker in the eye!
He dreamt he'd black'd
[Sound Fx] Whistle
He dreamt he'd black'd
[Sound Fx] Whistle
Oh! Lor! he dreamt he'd been and gorn,
and black'd the Speaker's eye!

Then an awful silence filled the House,
each member was as still as a mouse,
while the Speaker writhed
and screwed his face
and tried to read his eye with the Mace;
at last he cried: "Oh tell me true?
Is my eye not black, and green, and blue?"
Then the Premier looked, and made reply,
"I see some green in the Speaker's eye!
I see some green,
[Sound Fx] Whistle
I see some green,
[Sound Fx] Whistle
I move the House do now adjourn
to bathe the Speaker's eye!"

Soft karaoke
Words
treble clef 1
treble clef 2
lyric line
bass
*
The Speaker's Eye 1882 George Grossmith
Written By Arthur Law
Composed By George Grossmith
copyright 1882 by Hopwood & Crew, 42 New Bond St.,  London, W.
described as J.L. Toole's Great Song. The Speaker's Eye
Sung By Him With Immense Success
in the Musical Farce Mr. Guffin's Elopement
sequence and karaoke by Dr. Pitt-Payne in London UK
on Tuesday 02 July 2002 at 09.30
in association with Doug Grierson
*