The Physician 1933 'Nymph Errant'

Dr. Pitt-Payne in London UK - 23 May 2002

Once I loved such a shattering physician,
Quite the bestlooking doctor in the state,
He looked after my physical condition,
and his bedside manner was great.
When I'd gaze up
and see him there above me,
looking less like a doctor than a Turk,
I was tempted to whisper,
"Do you love me,
Or do you merely love your work?"

He said my bronchial tubes were entrancing,
My epiglottis filled him with glee,
He simply loved my larynx
and went wild about my pharynx,
but he never said he loved me.
He said my epidermis was darling,
and found my blood as blue as could be,
he went through wild ecstatics,
when I showed him my lymphatics,
but he never said he loved me.
And though, no doubt,
it was not very smart of me,
I kept on awracking my soul
to figure out
why he lov'd ev'ry part of me,
and yet not me as a whole.
With my oesophagus he was ravished,
enthusiastic to a degree,
he said 'twas just enormous,
My appendix vermiformis,
but he never said he loved me.

He said my cerebellum was brilliant,
and my cerebrum far from N.G.
I know he thought a lotta
My medulla oblongata,
but he never said he loved me.
He said my maxillaries were marvels,
and found my sternum stunning to see,
he did a double hurdle
when I shook my pelvic girdle,
but he never said he loved me.
He seemed amused
when he first made a test of me
to further his medical art,
yet he refused
when he'd fixed up the rest of me,
to cure that ache in my heart.
I know he thought my pancreas perfect,
and for my spleen was keen as could be.
He said of all his sweeties,
I'd the sweetest diabetes,
but he never said he loved me.

He said my vertebrae were 'sehr schöne',
and called my coccyx 'plus que gentil',
he murmured 'molto bella',
when I sat on his patella,
but he never said he loved me.
He took a fleeting look at my thorax,
and started singing slightly off key,
He cried: "May Heaven strike us,"
when I played my umbilicus,
but he never said he loved me.
As it was dark,
I suggested we walk about
before he returned to his post.
Once in the park,
I induced him to talk about
the thing I wanted the most.
He lingered on with me until morning,
Yet when I tried to pay him his fee,
He said: "Why, don't be funny,
It is I who owe you money,"
but he never said he loved me.

Soft karaoke
Words
treble clef 1
treble clef 2
lyric line
bass
*
The Physician 1933
by Cole Porter
copyright 1933 by Warner Bros. Inc.
sequence and karaoke by Dr. Pitt-Payne in London UK
on Thursday 23 May 2002 at 22.01
in association with Doug Grierson
*
from 'Nymph Errant'
Published September 1933. Originally titled
'But He Never Says He Loves Me'.
It was first presented in the pre-New York
performances of 'The New Yorkers'. (1930)
Subsequently, it was ear-marked for the
un-produced show 'Star Dust' (1931)
The title changed to 'The Physician'
and a few lyric changes occurred during
rehearsals for 'Nymph Errant'. Gertrude Lawrence,
who introduced it, recorded it on October 18th, 1933.
Porter recorded it on January 3rd, 1935.
*
JP-P