The Mormon Coon 1905

James Pitt-Payne, London UK - 16 Sep 2004

A coon named Ephraim
skipped the town one day,
nobody knew just why he went away.
Until one night a friend he got a note,
it was from Eph, and this is what he wrote;
I'm out in Utah, in the Mormon land,
and going to stay, because I'm living grand,
I used to rave about a single life.
Now every day I get a brand new wife.

I've got a big brunette,
and a blonde to pet,
I've got 'em short, fat, thin and tall....
I've got a Cuban girl, and a Zulu pal.
They come in bunches when I call;
and that's not all
I've got 'em pretty too, got a homely few,
I've got 'em black to octaroon....
I can spare six or eight,
shall I ship 'em by freight?
For I am The Mormon Coon.

I've got a big brunette,
and a blonde to pet,
I've got 'em short, fat, thin and tall....
I've got a Cuban girl, and a Zulu pal.
They come in bunches when I call;
and that's not all
I've got 'em pretty too, got a homely few,
I've got 'em black to octaroon....
I can spare six or eight,
shall I ship 'em by freight?
For I am The Mormon Coon.

There's one gal I ain't married yet, but say,
I'm saving her up for a rainy day,
if you ain't never heard a cyclone roar,
come up and hear
just how my wives can snore.
If you stay out late you can "con" your wife,
if I get gay that mob would have my life.
It keeps me hustling in the loving line,
they all yell out:
"I saw him first, he's mine!"

I've got a big brunette,
and a blonde to pet,
I've got 'em short, fat, thin and tall....
I've got a Cuban girl, and a Zulu pal.
They come in bunches when I call;
and that's not all
I've got 'em pretty too, got a homely few,
I've got 'em black to octaroon....
I can spare six or eight,
shall I ship 'em by freight?
For I am The Mormon Coon.

I've got a big brunette,
and a blonde to pet,
I've got 'em short, fat, thin and tall....
I've got a Cuban girl, and a Zulu pal.
They come in bunches when I call;
and that's not all
I've got 'em pretty too, got a homely few,
I've got 'em black to octaroon....
I can spare six or eight,
shall I ship 'em by freight?
For I am The Mormon Coon.

Next fall they'll make me Gov'nor of the State,
the Parsons give me commutation rate;
I wish for every wife I had a cent,
why, just for photographs, a house I rent.
I've got so many, I forget a lot,
I keep the marriage licence door bell hot,
if on the street into a wife I ran,
I have to ask her:
"What's your number, Hen?"

I've got a big brunette,
and a blonde to pet,
I've got 'em short, fat, thin and tall....
I've got a Cuban girl, and a Zulu pal.
They come in bunches when I call;
and that's not all
I've got 'em pretty too, got a homely few,
I've got 'em black to octaroon....
I can spare six or eight,
shall I ship 'em by freight?
For I am The Mormon Coon.

I've got a big brunette,
and a blonde to pet,
I've got 'em short, fat, thin and tall....
I've got a Cuban girl, and a Zulu pal.
They come in bunches when I call;
and that's not all
I've got 'em pretty too, got a homely few,
I've got 'em black to octaroon....
I can spare six or eight,
shall I ship 'em by freight?
For I am The Mormon Coon.

Soft karaoke
Words
piano 1
piano 2
piano 3
piano 4
lyric
pizz str bass
*
The Mormon Coon 1905
Music by Henry Clay Smith
Lyrics by Raymond A. Browne
© 1905 by Sol Bloom, N.Y. & Chicago
*
sequence and karaoke by James Pitt-Payne, London UK
on Thursday 16 September 2004 at 22.40
in association with Doug Grierson
*