At The Telephone 1906

by James Pitt-Payne, London UK - 19 Feb 2006
2006

Of all the people wellinformed
on topics new and strange,
commend me to the knowing girl
at the telephone exchange,
you wish to speak to a friend up town
in the booth you disappear,
and this is the talk she catches
through the receiver at her ear.

Hello, is that you, Angie?
Well, this is Jack, you know
we met last week at Sherry's
no, I'm not married, no,
Ah! Anything on for this evening?
What's that, I can if I'll try?
Oh, fine! I'll be up in a minute
ding, ding, goodbye.

At luncheon hour comes Gertrude,
who is going to the "mat!
on her gowns the stamp of fashion,
on her mind there's only a hat,
she's a message of importance,
won't they try to quiet her fears,
the girl on the wire gets her number through
and this is what she hears.

Hello, is that you, Maudie?
I'm going to have it pink
No, stuff them with bananas
she's lovely, I don't think
M'm, M'm, he's simply charming,
he's mine, if I wish to try,
what's that, you are going to marry him?
Ding, ding, goodbye.

It's ten A.M. a gent comes in
a perfect gent she knows,
for 'neath his topcoat she can see
that he wears his evening clothes,
he wants to talk to his wifey dear,
so he takes the nearest booth,
"It is to laugh" for the girl
who hears this line of gospel truth.

Hello, say, this is Henry
couldn't get home last night
sorry here at the office
oh, I'm all right, all right.
What's that, you're goin' to mother?
I tell you, Kate, you're wrong
Yes, and I'm goin' out for another,
ding, ding, so long.

From gay old Forty Second Street
comes Mr. RaceTrack Tout,
He's got a sure thing on a horse
and he wants to bawl it out.
To get the info to his pal
he beats it to the 'phone
and here is the spiel he sends along
in a style that's all his own.

Hello, is that you, Mickey?
Well, this is Hicks and say
play Janitor in the second race,
he's goin' to clean up today.
Now don't say nothin' to no one
get off the wire, there, you,
what's that? they've gone and scratched him,
ding, ding, skidoo.

With swishing skirts and jaunty air
the next to come along,
direct from eighty one night stands,
is the Queen of dance and song,
while disengaged, into vaud'ville
she means to take a flyer,
you'd guess as much from the line of talk
she sends along the wire:

Hello! is that you Louie?
How 'bout those contracts, Lou?
Four hundred a week I told you
billed as headline too.
For me! Why I'm a knock out
Russell got twice that pay
Well, if you can't get more than forty,
all right, O.K.

Soft karaoke
Words
piano 1
piano 2
piano 3
piano 4
lyric
pizz str bass
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At The Telephone 1906
Music by Anna Caldwell
Lyrics by James O'Dea
© 1906 by F. B. Haviland Pub. Co. Inc.  N.Y.
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sequence and karaoke by James Pitt-Payne, London UK
on Sunday 19 February 2006 at 17.27
in association with Doug Grierson
*