06 That's Your Funeral 1960 'Oliver'

Dr. Pitt-Payne in London UK - 16 May 2003

[Mr. Sowerberry:] He's a born
undertaker's mute.
I can see him in a black silk suit.
Following behind the funeral procession
with his features fixed
in a suitable expression.
There'll be horses with tall black plumes
to escort us to the fam'ly tombs,
with mourners in all corners
who've been taught to weep in tune.

Then the coffin lined with satin
that's your funeral
[Mrs. S:] That's your funeral.
[Mr. S:] Large enough
to wear your hat in
that's your funeral
[Mrs. S:] That's your funeral.
[Mr. S:] We're just here
to glamourise you
for that endless sleep,
[Mr. and Mrs. S:] You might
just as well look fetching
when you're six foot deep.

[Mr. S:] At the wake
we'll drink a toddy
to the body beautiful,
that's your funeral
[Mrs. S:] Not our funeral
[Mr. S:] that's your funeral

[Mr. Sowerberry produces a tape and
begins to measure Mr. Bumble
as he sings:]

[Mr. S:] If you're fond of overeating
that's your funeral
[Mrs. S:] That's your funeral.
[Mr. S:] Starve yourself
by undereating
that's your funeral
[Mr. Bumble:] That's my funeral?
[Mr. S:] Visualise the earth descending
on you clod by clod.
You can't come back
when you're buried underneath the sod.

[Mr. and Mrs. S:] We will not
reduce our prices
keep your vices usual.
[Mr. S:] That's your funeral
[Mrs. S:] Not our funeral
[Mr. S:] That's your funeral.

[Mr. Bumble turns to go but is
stopped by Mr. and Mrs. Sowerberry:]

[Mr. Bumble:] I don't think
this song is funny!
[Mr. S:] That's your funeral
[Mrs. S:] That's your funeral.
[Mr. Bumble:] Here's the boy,
now where's the money?
[Mr. S:] That's your funeral
[Mr. Bumble:] That's YOUR funeral.
[Mr. S:] We don't harbour
thoughts macabre,
there's no need to frown.
[Mr. and Mrs. S:] In the end
we'll either burn you up
or nail you down.

[Mr. Bumble exits:]

[Mr. S:] We love coughs
and wheezes and diseases
called incurable.
[Mr. and Mrs. S:] That's your funeral
[Mr. S:] No one elses funeral
[Mr. and Mrs. S:] That's your funeral!

Soft karaoke
Words
piano 1
piano 2
piano 3
piano 4
lyric
*
That's Your Funeral 1960 Oliver
Trio (Mr. and Mrs. Sowerberry and Mr. Bumble)
by Lionel Bart
copyright 1960 by Lakeview Mus.Pub.Co.Ltd.
sequence and karaoke by Dr. Pitt-Payne in London UK
on Friday 16 May 2003 at 16.19
in association with Doug Grierson, Funeral Director
*